Monday, January 3, 2011

holy cow!

so, a little about me.... this is my very first blog post ever and i'm not quite sure how i feel about it.... i am going to look at it like sending emails to friends and family... proper punctuation and spell check rules are flexible...

for the last year i have been "fun-employed" as i like to call it.  a way nicer way to look at unemployment, don't you think?  i lost my job as a marketing exec in the entertainment industry in early 2010 and have spent most of the last year trying to "find" myself.  i wasn't all that thrilled in my last job and when i was "restructured" out of the studio i kind of looked at it like being dumped by that guy i was never really into.... you know what i mean... a blow to the ego but probably the best for me in the long run.

up until this point i have always been one of those people that have luckily met or exceeded all of the goals that i set for myself career wise. that is, until i realized that what i was doing wasn't making me happy or fulfilling me in the way that i felt i needed to be fulfilled. it also helped that i had a nasty habit of working for crazy people. and truly, if i didn't spend all of 2009 and part of 2008 being so miserable working for one such crazy person i might not have come to the realization that i did so easily.  i had an opiphany (and oprah inspired epiphany!) that i just wasn't loving what i was doing anymore and i really wanted to figure out what i could be passionate about doing.  it is such a strange thing to have a goal of being happy but not knowing exactly what i need to do to get there.

when i first lost my job i spent the initial months organizing my life and my home because i wanted to change the energy and love my space again.  i cleared out so much clutter literally and figuratively during that time that it was such a relief. it also helped that i had just returned home from a trip to india.  being there amongst so much poverty really helps one to realize that we just don't need that much stuff. because that is all it is.  stuff.   not to say that i don't love nice pretty things and still indulge on occasion. i do.  i am just a little more thoughtful with purchases these days.  and as a former marketing gal, writing an ebay or craigslist ad was fun and easy!

after the big apartment clean up i decided to get back in touch with the creative side of my personality with the hopes of opening myself up to new possibilities (ugh! trust me i am not so new agey as i just sounded in that statement!) and signed up for all sorts of art classes to fill my free time.  really taking advantage of the term "FUN-employemt."  i first took a weaving class.  yep, weaving. on a loom.  like olden times.  like i saw 12 year old kids do so easily in india. during my 3 month class i realized that weaving is hard. and monotonous. and hurts my back.  i slaved over this pathetic piece that looks like something i could have purchased at ikea for $2.99.  actually, mine was so uneven, ikea would not have passed it through their quality control. so sad.  but, on the bright side, i had a great time in class and met all sorts of interesting people.

i then took wheel throwing pottery. demi moore made it look so simple in GHOST. i wonder if she ended up with any of the blisters and scars that i now have on the outsides of my hands.  mind you, i was the only person in class with bleeding hands and red streaks running around the wheel in my white clay.  apparently there is sand in clay (who knew?) and my delicate hands couldn't take it... any fantasies i had about becoming the next jonathan adler went quickly out the window.

not all of my forays into creative classes were a disaster.  i also took a few levels of metal smithing jewelry (LOVE!) and have stuck with it as well as adobe illustrator (i designed my own christmas card!).

in between classes, hikes in the hollywood hills, and visits to my gym (not kidding about making the most of my fun-employment!) i have been helping my friends decorate and organize their lives as well and have been having lots of fun with it! when i was younger i was always interested in interior design and never had the balls or the confidence in my creativity to pursue it. so instead i became a business/ marketing major and entered the corporate world that i lived and breathed for the last almost 20 years. but i have been an hgtv junky for a lot of years and love love love decorating my place and giving friends advice on theirs.  a friend of mine is a therapist and needed a new look for her office so i offered to help.  i had such a great time redecorating her office that i thought maybe this is for me....

so, that's where we come to now.  the night before i start my internship.  yes, internship.  i am 39 years old (i can't believe i am this old!) and i am beginning an internship tomorrow with an interior designer.  this person happens to be someone whose work i really really admire and has designed some of my most favorite spaces!  such an amazing talent and i figured if i am going to give this a shot then i want to do it with someone that in my opinion is the best of the best!  i have never interned before in my life.  when i was in college i had to make money to pay for it and could never have worked for free even though it would have looked fab on my resume. so, i thought this would be the perfect way to see if interior design is in fact what i want to do in my next life. why spend money on school for this before learning in the environment if this is in fact something i want to do.  i really hope that i figure out in 2011 what i want to be when i "grow up" and even better if i can do so before i turn 40!  i have absolutely no idea what to expect and am nervous...

so, until next time...

the almost 40 year old intern

p.s. below are pics of a home design project i am really proud of... i created my own artwork collage wall using original artwork i picked up on my world travels as well as vintage pieces and cherished family photos.


  1. You go, girl! So looking forward to hearing your adventures in interning!!!

  2. Oh, and I'm gunna need you to go ahead and get me a grande soy latte. ;)

  3. just found you via Apartment Therapy. Did you just start blogging 6 months ago and yet you ALREADY made it on AT?! I bow to thee!

    You sound like me. I am a creative soul wrapped in the exterior of a corporate marketing person...getting my soul sucked out of my body on a daily 9-5 routine. So jealous that you are an almost 40 year old intern.

    best of luck!
    the 38-year old souless tired workerbee

  4. I love your blog, the rug you painted, and your can-do attitude. I am an almost 50 year old intern! (Even though I am incredibly young looking for my age!) I went back to school in 2008 to learn video editing, and I've never regretted it. But I relate to all your trials and tribulations, and I fist-pump your triumphs. In my internship application, I quoted the inventor of the Ramen Noodle, Momofuko Ando: "I invented instant ramen when I was 48 and Cup Noodles at 61. In life, there is no such thing as too late." Rock on, Intern Girl!

    1. Hi lynnji15
      would love to hear your side of story when you started. What was the biggest challenge? any particular instance you'd like to share of your lows and highs off course that got you back with the feeling that the choice was right.

  5. lynniji15 thank you so much for your comment & thanks for taking the time to leave it. i have to say i got a little misty eyed reading it. it is so nice to meet a kindred spirit and i love that you are following your dream as well, at almost 50 no less! and i think i need to print that quote and put in on my fridge because it is awesome! xoxo

  6. when I find a blog that I like i immediately go to the first post. I also started my blog this year. i am also looking to find myself after turning over my body and soul ,first,to help my mother (divorced) in raising my sister and me and then to my children and husband. I'm also 39 and have just found my true calling, eventhough I'm an architect and teacher, graphic design and all things art bring me joy like nothing else (children being nice with mom is a good thing!)'ve come a long way baby! from this 1st post to the tweet that brought me here: your internship at HGTV...WOW!!! keep up what you're doing 'cause you're doing it great...

  7. thanks alexandra! that is awesome that you are finding yourself too! it's never too late and 39 is the new 19, right? anyhow, i am not an intern at hgtv (but i LOVE hgtv).. i actually intern for a fab los angeles based designer... someday i would love to be on hgtv as it is my very favorite channel!

  8. okay, now i really like you. who the heck blogs about being a 40 year old intern? well, i guess anyone with a kick-a#@ sense of humor.

    i'm 42 and hoping i'll figure out what i wanna be soon. and hope it's something that can help pay the bills.

  9. WOW...thank you for your share. I really appreciate your openess about where you are at in your life and your experience at this stage of the game. today is my birthday at 44 and i am courageously looking at what it will take to reinvent myself, newly divorced w/ 3 kids. i went for an interview for construction worker field positions and think it might be fun to get paid to where my jeans. i too love using my hands & working on home projects. i am a home organizing coach, stager and estate clearer in ny and don't like marketing and selling or what looks like boasting about myself. thanks for showing that its ok to be human and eplore. good luck with creating a life you love.

  10. thanks erja! happy birthday!!! thank you for leaving such a sweet message! and good for you for taking a chance as well! i hope you get the job you want! one thing about life is it seems way too short and doing what you love is such an important part of it! it's been a crazy ride trying to get there but i don't regret it at all! thanks for the well wishes and all the best to you too! xoxo

  11. I like your blog and your ideas. However, I have to say, as someone who works with teenagers, I found the fact that you don't use proper punctuation distracting. It seems like the style of a much younger, and less mature, person. I hope that you clean that up later - it makes you seem like you don't take yourself seriously. But, more importantly - great blog, lovely ideas. Thanks for sharing.

    1. Laura- Thanks for taking the time to write! My Dad would probably agree with you as he has been reading from the beginning and has mentioned it numerous times. Since my blog really started as an update for friends and family I was really lax about all of that plus I really like the look of lowercase letters more than uppercase. Weird, I know. The good news is I have switched it up in recent posts. Thanks for the compliments and for reading. Xo

  12. wow this is amazing and awesome ideas thank you so much bro!

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